Tag Archives: Anger

Don’t Take on Other’s Stuff

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5 Common Ways Of Transmuting Emotional Energies

| September 19, 2016 

5 Common Ways Of Transmuting Emotional Energies

by Michelle Walling, CHLC

Relationships are a gift whether you are on the giving end or the receiving end. Being able to share consciousness with another human being is a balancing act. There are 5 common ways of transmuting emotional energies that may cause conflicts within a relationship.

What do you do if you are suddenly the recipient of unwarranted anger or negative emotions? Our innate programming usually leads us to defend ourselves which is a natural deflection and return of these negative energies. One of the ego’s roles is that of protection and this action creates a behavioral pattern that can be broken with awareness and intention.

Emotions are energy-in-motion and are the unique tool of the human body that allows it to feel and create. Those that carry a high vibration have less negative energy and therefore exhibit less negative emotions. These people were either born a “saint” and never held anything against anyone else or they had a lot of work to do to get them to where they are now.

There aren’t many saints on the planet at this time, although the numbers are rapidly growing because people are recognizing these 5 ways of transmuting emotional energies and are learning to deal with them in a whole new way:

  1. Anger– This is the most common way to expel negative energies. This is usually triggered when someone gets their feelings hurt or when a deep seeded emotion of abuse from childhood or even from a past life is triggered.
  1. Crying– Some people may cry to release painful memories. This seems to be more of the female population that allows themselves to do this, as men have been programmed to think that they need to be macho. When a man falls in love through a relationship or with the birth of a child for example, the heart chakra opens and allows for crying to be a valuable tool in transforming energies. Again, it is not as important to know where these energies came from as it is to allow them to pass through and be expelled.
  1. Sarcasm– This is a quick witted way to move through negative energy using a little humor and laughter. It is a paradoxical way to let an energy out while at the same time transmuting it with laughter which is of a high vibration. Eventually someone who has removed their lower vibrational energy will not use this tool.
  1. Passive aggressive behavior– People who act submissive and indecisive to draw in conflict are using this as a tool to move energy without creating the conflict themselves. The ego likes to do this because it then says, “see, I didn’t start this argument. This is not my fault”. Those that are being passive aggressive are usually not aware of their actions and always think of themselves as the victim.
  1. Depression– The state of depression is the mind’s way of making the person’s world stop at a particular vibration so that it can be examined. This may involve long periods of isolation and deep unhappiness. Chronic depression is an extreme way to trigger a person to see that something has to change. The holistic way to deal with depression is to move that energy that is perpetually stuck. Many times the cause of the energy has to be uncovered and depression serves as the clue that this energy must be looked at on a deeper level in order to heal the underlying cause. Psychology, energy healing, and hypnosis or past life regression are better ways to heal depression rather than pharmaceuticals which only relieve symptoms of depression. In severe cases of depression, a mix of both pharmaceuticals and therapy may be necessary for a period of time, especially in those who have suicidal thoughts.

The thing to focus on if you are the recipient of someone expelling negative energy toward you is to learn how to not take it on as your own. This involves recognizing that you can serve them by being the witness of the anger or sarcasm tool used to say “pay attention to me, I am hurting and I have energy I need to transmute”.

Sometimes our jobs as loving soul mates means that we agreed to provide situation that trigger these emotions to come to the surface. Realizing this puts us in the right frame of mind to observe rather than react. If this becomes a repeated pattern with the person then it is showing that they are not completely letting go of the energy and you may need to assist them a little further by talking about it or perhaps with some energy work with them.

Another service you can provide is to create a shield of protection that not only keeps the energy out of your aura but also transmutes it as well. Here is a way to create a shield that you can put up daily.

Take several deep breaths, breathing in through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Now imagine that you are a tree and that your feet and toes are roots that go deep within the Earth. Connect with the core of the Earth (the Earth’s heart) and imagine her energies coming back up through your roots, into your root chakra, sexual chakra, sacral charka, and finally settling into your heart. Imagine that you have a column of golden white light coming in through the top of your head that comes form Source (All That Is, God, or whatever name you choose). Imagine this light comes also comes through your oversoul and higher self into your crown chakra, then into your third eye, throat chakra, and meets the Earth’s energy in your heart. Turn the mixture of this energy into a ball of golden light that you then expand as a force field around you that keeps you protected. Intend that all negative energies that come your way are absorbed on the exterior of that force field and sent down into the planet to be transmuted. (There are loving elementals that do this as their service to the planet that can handle these types of energies.) Take a few deep breaths and thank the Universe and all beings that are working with you in your highest good for helping to transmute energies for all beings that need it who come around your energy field. You are now a walking transmutation golden bubble of Source energy, grounded into the planet!

Don Miguel Ruiz says it best with one of the Four Agreements from his book of the same name:

Don’t take anything personally- Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

Another important thing to keep in mind is that we attract what is most like ourselves on a vibrational standpoint. If someone is angry with you, perhaps it may be a reflection of your own anger and they are giving you a clue by matching your vibration. This is a great gift because it can trigger the need to look deeper within yourself to see what still needs to be healed.

It is imperative that we learn how to be responsible with our own energies, thoughts, and actions. Intention and action to recognize and react differently to situations will break down the programming that has ./.kept us in a cycle of dissonance and unhappiness.

Our external world is a reflection of our inner world. As we shift the energy within, our external world has to change. The place of transformation is the heart center, which is made up of the highest vibration of love. Find your heart center and exist within it, and watch the world around you along with all of those that are in it either change to match it or leave your reality.

from:    http://www.bodymindsoulspirit.com/5-common-ways-of-transmuting-emotional-energies/

On Anger

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The Downside of Anger

A strong emotion that is accompanied by arousal of the nervous system, anger produces effects throughout the body. But if you express it, you’re not necessarily better off.
By Hara Estroff Marano, published on July 01, 2003 – last reviewed on April 13, 2007Funny thing about anger. As emotions go it’s often pretty clear-cut. It’s rarely subtle.

But is there an emotion that is more misunderstood? Many believe that holding anger in is bad for you, that it only builds pressure to be expressed. In fact, sudden bursts of anger or prolonged anger are bad for you. A strong emotion that is accompanied by arousal of the nervous system, anger produces effects throughout the body. It eats away at your cardiovascular system, your gut and hijacks nervous system, often obliterating the capacity for clear thinking. And it may even grow in intensity.

But express it—and you’re not necessarily better off. Anger doesn’t automatically dissipate by being unleashed. We rarely experience catharsis. Venting it in words or action doesn’t make anger easier to manage; often it only increases the intensity of the feeling. Anger often feeds on itself. Plus, by furthering aggression it often brings irreversible damage to those in the immediate vicinity.

People have trouble managing anger and other negative emotions. Anger is often one of the few emotions men consider it “acceptable” to display. But that doesn’t mean they respond well when someone else displays anger towards them.

In many cultures, women are under pressure to conceal their anger. Sometimes they do such a good job of it they don’t even recognize it in themselves.

Because anger is such a forceful negative emotion and makes people uncomfortable, taboos about expressing it are widespread. How many of us have heard some variation of this refrain while growing up: “If you are going to stomp around the house you can go to your room and stay there until you’ve finished being angry.”

The sad upshot is, under those conditions no one learns how to manage anger appropriately. People may not even recognize when they are angry. Or they may conceal anger until it explodes out of them in the form of hurtful words or deeds.

Studies show that the ability to identify and label emotions correctly, and talk about them straightforwardly to the point of feeling understood, makes negative feelings dissipate. And the physiologic arousal that accompanies those feelings also diminishes dramatically.

But when anger is deemed unacceptable, people stay in a state of arousal, unable to pay attention to what is going on in the world around them, unable to regulate their own behavior and focused only on their inner emotional state. In fact, they tend to experience excessive physiologic arousal in situations involving negative emotions—but they tend not to display any external signs of emotional response. Imagine how that can confuse a friend or a spouse! That’s because they hide their emotions but feel anxious in emotionally evocative situations.

Sometimes, however, telling someone we are angry brings feelings of relief, especially when we also express why we are angry. Psychologists believe that the relief we feel under those circumstances results not from venting the anger but from identifying the anger-arousing circumstances and working towards a solution.

And that points to the positive value that anger has. It’s a great motivator for change. It encourages us to speak up about something bothering us.

But it’s all in how we do it, because in goading us to action about things that upset us, anger can also prompt us to overreact. So first and foremost, lengthen your fuse so that you are not reacting to every tiny upset and you can think your way to a constructive solution.

  • Take three deep breaths.When you are angry, your body becomes tense. Breathing deeply will ease the tension and help lower your internal anger meter.
  • Change your environment.The quickest way to uncouple yourself from an ongoing source of anger is to take a five-minute walk to get some fresh air. Stuck in traffic? Take a mental escape by turning up the radio and singing at the top of your lungs.
  • Know why you feel angry.Track down the clues about the kinds of things, situation, people and events that trigger your anger. Anger often masks our deepest fears. In an angry-making situation, ask yourself what deep fears it might be stirring in you.
  • Let go of what is beyond your control.You can change only yourself and your responses to others, not what others do to you. Getting angry doesn’t fix the situation and makes you feel worse. If someone constantly arouses your anger, focus on the troublesome situation and brainstorm solutions.
  • Express yourself.Be sure to think first and use measured tones and words that are not emotionally loaded. In a nonconfrontational way state that you are angry and identify the situation that makes you angry and why it ticks you off.
  • Be cautious.There are situations in which expressing your anger holds danger. Having a jealous or abusive partner is one. Vent to a friend instead of the person who wronged you; you may wind up with some solutions you never imagined.
  • Be assertive, not aggressive, in expressing yourself.Assertiveness requires speaking in an effective, nonviolent way towards a constructive goal. It may help if you rehearse your response before delivering it.
  • Make positive statements.Memorize a few positive statements to say to yourself when your anger is triggered. They will remind you that you can choose your behavior instead of reacting in a knee-jerk way. For example, you might say: “I can take care of my own needs” or “His needs are just as important as mine” or “I am able to make good choices.”
  • from:    http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200308/the-downside-anger

Deepak Chopra on The ‘Occupy’ Movement

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Deepak Chopra

Author, ‘War of the Worldviews’; Founder, The Chopra Foundation

 The ‘Occupy’ Movement: Turning Anger Into Awareness
Posted: 10/6/11 09:16 AM ET
If you haven’t found yourself caught up in the Occupy movement yet, the best place is in the thick of the action. I went down to Wall Street one night to see for myself. Like many people, if not all, the outcome of the financial crash still rankled. No one can watch the TV coverage of the Occupy America sit-ins and marches without sharing in some kind of frustration and anger.

When you get down there, though, you feel something else. Unlike the Tea Party, the Occupiers are young and idealistic, repeating a time-honored coming of age phase that is being acted out in public. Anyone who has lived through the sixties can stand aside and predict what will happen, because it has happened so often before. Ideals become lost in confusion, cynicism, and hard clashes with authority and other reactionary forces.

But let’s not make such predictions. If Occupy America turns anger into awareness, we might get something like a Tea Party for the left. Or even better, a reform movement that marches for an ideal that succeeds. If the Tea Party represents the ornery, “I’m mad as hell, and I won’t put up with it anymore” side of America, the Occupiers represent the side that says, “This country stands for justice and equality.”

Despite the media coverage of mass arrests, despite the Times‘s finger-wagging that the movement is often muddled and misinformed, none of that is the point. The point is justice. Unlike the anti-war movement of fifty years ago, now we have a President who believes in justice and equality. It’s fashionable to bash President Obama right now, but he has had to make choices between bad and worse, facing an intractable downturn and an opposition that leaves him no breathing room.

If Occupy America can channel its anger into awareness, the next step is to ask, “What is our goal?” When I was down among the demonstrators, I led a meditation on that question, and it seemed to calm down the people around me, which demonstrates, I think, that the whole Occupy movement is about angry idealists, not just people who feel screwed by Wall St., although that is the spark and the point of injustice that somehow must be faced.

Pragmatists claim that one outcome — a heavily regulated financial sector — will never happen. The banks were bailed out three years ago, and once they felt strong, they lobbied with all their might to insure that no meaningful regulation would be passed. that is outrageous, of course, and so is the immorality of how Wall St., having caused the crash, continues to take ungodly risks, but now with a government guarantee that they won’t fail, no matter how reckless their behavior. Right now Wall St. is the pure culture of money at its most selfish, greedy, and anti-social. If you aren’t angry about that, you aren’t breathing.

We stand at a pivotal moment when anger can continue to fester and feed upon itself — if that’s what you want, the Tea Party is ready to welcome you with open arms. Or anger can rebuild the system that caused all the problems. Occupy America is pure democracy against pure power, because nobody should have any illusion about who holds all the aces. I can’t predict where the movement will go; perhaps it will fizzle out tomorrow with a resigned sigh.

But I do know that truth must be spoken to power. Eventually, all change starts there, by ignoring the odds and the threat of punishment, by standing up and saying “I accuse you of injustice.” This action must be taken over and over again, and if the people speaking truth to power have right on their side and not just a boiling stew pot of rage, things will change. There’s no reason why an Arab spring can’t turn into an American autumn.

deepakchopra.com